I stepped out the school building of where I worked. It was a glorious sunny day and I needed to let the sun's rays dissolve the heaviness of my body and mind. I was doing alright, I could feel the warm embrace of the blessings that I'd been chanting all day, and the love of the Holy Spirit leading my way. But still, obviously that day was a day for major healing and purging, because shit was coming up out of the wood works of my mind- shit, meaning the past, meaning pain. I have been working long enough with this process that I know these are the times when the least resistance is called for; this is my chance to release and clear the past. What would happen a few moments later would change my life forever, and add a depth and sweetness to my life that I will never forget; Talia Miller, taught me in no words, the meaning of life, and showed be again the healing power of unconditional love.
I turned around to go back into the school, when something just urged me to turn around one last time to breath in the sun's warmth and pure rays. It was then I saw Talia Miller; a girl, barely one, with the richest brown curls and biggest, softest deep brown eyes. I knew Talia well; her brother was in my class and I got to see her and coon over her in much joy before. But God had decided; this was the day Anshin Higashibaba would Return to Love on a deep and profound level, and he sent a tiny, powerful angel running the minute she laid eyes on me in the parking lot. The sound of her "yay" was the sound of pure love. Part of me froze in terror in the presents of such unconditional, powerful love. Her arms wide open she called out to me. Her baby yell said "come it's ok, open up, there is no need to be afraid." In the presents of love all your wounds will be brought to the surface; we cling to our fear because it so familiar. To come into the light can be so terrifying to a heart that has suffered so much betrayal of that love. But "the pain that we feel is not because of the love we didn't receive in the past, but the love and we are not giving in the present" (Marianne Williamson). The deepest realm of my soul; the tenderest love was awakened and coxed out of me with the sound of her laugh and the twinkle of her eye. I held out my hand to her and she held onto it for a second with a look in her eyes that said, "You are the most beautiful , wonderful person I have ever seen, and I love you." She laughed out loud, with her hand on her mouth like a tiny old lady, while her big brown eyes sparkled more brightly than the stars on a clear night.
All the way up the stairs to the school she looked over her mother's shoulder at me and laughed. The feeling that it let go inside me goes beyond all words. I pause right now to ask the Holy Spirit to help me express on paper the wonder of this love. It was as if the scrumptious, Talia, angel-baby inside me awoke from a 20 year slumber and was laughing again, and spilling out onto the wounds of my mind; pushing out the poison and casting out the darkness that I so clung to for so many years. All of a sudden I realized for a split second in time, but a split second that will last for all eternity, in the realm of our one reality, love, "this is the sweetness of me." The sweetness of me, is me. All I had to do was decide to drop the BS. The power of the sweetness that shown and flowed from Talia's being is also the power that lives in me. In truth, we are one. We are one because love is one. "Anshin, everything is ok, you are wonderful, you are beautiful, you are not who you think you are. You are one with God, you are one with yourself, you can love yourself because you are nothing less the beauty that you see that radiates from this child."
If the beauty of a flower takes your breath away, it's "The Glory of God", meaning the sweetness of love that is reaching out and touching your soul. You can relate because you resonate with it. Like a tuning fork you and the flower are the same note; the note of love. Through the vision of the Holy Spirit, through the asking for his help and his healing hands, we dissolve the barriers that block us from resonating with our brother's and sisters.
There's a story from Ancient India about a strange sort of boy who when you looked into his mouth down his throat you could see the entire universe. I wrote something out of an inspiration that came flowing through me from the Cosmos. I had been on the beach just an hour or so before, "emptying", praying, purifying/centering and I had this deep experience with the creation around me at the beach that reminded me profoundly of the story about this boy. When I looked out at the sunset, I realized suddenly that the sunset, was inside me! I was so exited. The sunset reflected me and visa versa, exactly the purity of my Spirit, and the wonder of the love that flows from my being. In other words I could experience the Glory of God because the Glory of God is inside me. There's no place the sunset starts and I end, the ocean begins and the sunset starts ~ we pulse together, THIS is the oneness and peace of God, this is love. So this is what I wrote that evening:
The Universe is like huge computer built to resonate love. You are a
microcosm of the Universe; you were built to resonate love. The
darkness that we've created on this earth is like a virus on our
computer chip. We are in the process of "reprogramming" our chip - to
think with love. Love is abundant, so it brings abundance, love is
balanced, so it brings about balance, love is the greatest dream that
exists so it's the most practical attitude to bring about your dreams.
You send out love to the Universe, you bring all that you need to your
feet, because love is the thread that runs through all things. Love
always is, and always will be, so the difference you make in yourself
and others in love, always is, and always will be. Forever, and ever, Amen.
I turned around to go back into the school, when something just urged me to turn around one last time to breath in the sun's warmth and pure rays. It was then I saw Talia Miller; a girl, barely one, with the richest brown curls and biggest, softest deep brown eyes. I knew Talia well; her brother was in my class and I got to see her and coon over her in much joy before. But God had decided; this was the day Anshin Higashibaba would Return to Love on a deep and profound level, and he sent a tiny, powerful angel running the minute she laid eyes on me in the parking lot. The sound of her "yay" was the sound of pure love. Part of me froze in terror in the presents of such unconditional, powerful love. Her arms wide open she called out to me. Her baby yell said "come it's ok, open up, there is no need to be afraid." In the presents of love all your wounds will be brought to the surface; we cling to our fear because it so familiar. To come into the light can be so terrifying to a heart that has suffered so much betrayal of that love. But "the pain that we feel is not because of the love we didn't receive in the past, but the love and we are not giving in the present" (Marianne Williamson). The deepest realm of my soul; the tenderest love was awakened and coxed out of me with the sound of her laugh and the twinkle of her eye. I held out my hand to her and she held onto it for a second with a look in her eyes that said, "You are the most beautiful , wonderful person I have ever seen, and I love you." She laughed out loud, with her hand on her mouth like a tiny old lady, while her big brown eyes sparkled more brightly than the stars on a clear night.
All the way up the stairs to the school she looked over her mother's shoulder at me and laughed. The feeling that it let go inside me goes beyond all words. I pause right now to ask the Holy Spirit to help me express on paper the wonder of this love. It was as if the scrumptious, Talia, angel-baby inside me awoke from a 20 year slumber and was laughing again, and spilling out onto the wounds of my mind; pushing out the poison and casting out the darkness that I so clung to for so many years. All of a sudden I realized for a split second in time, but a split second that will last for all eternity, in the realm of our one reality, love, "this is the sweetness of me." The sweetness of me, is me. All I had to do was decide to drop the BS. The power of the sweetness that shown and flowed from Talia's being is also the power that lives in me. In truth, we are one. We are one because love is one. "Anshin, everything is ok, you are wonderful, you are beautiful, you are not who you think you are. You are one with God, you are one with yourself, you can love yourself because you are nothing less the beauty that you see that radiates from this child."
If the beauty of a flower takes your breath away, it's "The Glory of God", meaning the sweetness of love that is reaching out and touching your soul. You can relate because you resonate with it. Like a tuning fork you and the flower are the same note; the note of love. Through the vision of the Holy Spirit, through the asking for his help and his healing hands, we dissolve the barriers that block us from resonating with our brother's and sisters.
There's a story from Ancient India about a strange sort of boy who when you looked into his mouth down his throat you could see the entire universe. I wrote something out of an inspiration that came flowing through me from the Cosmos. I had been on the beach just an hour or so before, "emptying", praying, purifying/centering and I had this deep experience with the creation around me at the beach that reminded me profoundly of the story about this boy. When I looked out at the sunset, I realized suddenly that the sunset, was inside me! I was so exited. The sunset reflected me and visa versa, exactly the purity of my Spirit, and the wonder of the love that flows from my being. In other words I could experience the Glory of God because the Glory of God is inside me. There's no place the sunset starts and I end, the ocean begins and the sunset starts ~ we pulse together, THIS is the oneness and peace of God, this is love. So this is what I wrote that evening:
The Universe is like huge computer built to resonate love. You are a
microcosm of the Universe; you were built to resonate love. The
darkness that we've created on this earth is like a virus on our
computer chip. We are in the process of "reprogramming" our chip - to
think with love. Love is abundant, so it brings abundance, love is
balanced, so it brings about balance, love is the greatest dream that
exists so it's the most practical attitude to bring about your dreams.
You send out love to the Universe, you bring all that you need to your
feet, because love is the thread that runs through all things. Love
always is, and always will be, so the difference you make in yourself
and others in love, always is, and always will be. Forever, and ever, Amen.